Holding them closer

I guess I start with Thunderbird deciding that last week Wednesday was the perfect day to hang his leg in his haynet.

yes, this noble steed

When I came over for morning check just after 6am, he whinnied at me when I looked over the door into Lancey's stable, shouting MOM PLEASE HAAAAAALP. When I looked over at him, he was standing quietly in the back corner on three legs, his left front in his haynet, looking over his shoulder at me with big eyes.

My heart absolutely froze. How (or why) he decided that he needed to get his foot into his haynet, when his other haynet was still chock-full, I have no idea. I hurried to get him out, and bless his darling little soul, he just stood there for several minutes while I tried to get his giant foot out of the tiny hole he had somehow put it through. I was inwardly panicking. I have heard the horror stories about shattered knees and ruptured tendons from exactly this kind of injury. In fact I think I may have been outwardly panicking quite a bit as well, but Thunder obviously doesn't care about that and as soon as I freed him he just stretched out and took the longest pee ever. He hadn't touched his water in the other corner of his stable, and his bed was clean in the opposite corner, where he normally does his poos. He must have been stuck in that haynet for hours.

When my heart had slowed down and Thunder had gone over to his stable door to look around for his breakfast, I realized that he was walking on four legs with no obvious lameness and my brain finally registered that he was not actually crippled yet. I felt over both front legs for any trouble, and there was no swelling just yet, but the left fore was pretty hot over the back of the knee where it joins the cannon bone - where the check ligament sits. The SDFT seemed OK, and amazingly, his supporting leg hadn't even stocked up.

I sat down in the shavings right about then and offered up a prayer of thanks that Thunder is the most chill horse who has ever existed. If he had thrashed around or thrown himself on the ground or even twisted the haynet up so that it constricted his leg... It just doesn't bear thinking about.

Luckily, the physio was coming out to see another horse that same day, so I quickly called her and booked Thunder in for a check as well that afternoon.

To my eternal relief and gratitude, her findings were unremarkable. Thunder had absolutely no problems in his neck, shoulders, or upper back - he really couldn't have even pulled back against the haynet at all. His only problem was some stiffness in his left pectoral muscle, understandable considering he'd been stuck on three legs for hours, and a little tightness in his lower left back. He always has that when he gets bodywork done - it's just a combination of naturally being stiffer on that side, always being a little weaker in that left stifle, and me sitting too hard on my right hip. All things we're working on.

As for the leg itself, the news was much better than it might have been. He was 1/10 lame on the first trot up and practically sound after the session, and honestly I can't see the lameness at all, only the physio could with her more educated eye. There was some swelling over his left check ligament just below the knee. While there's only so much a physio can tell, she felt that scans would be unnecessary and that he likely just bruised the tendon sheath where the rope was pressing on it. Nothing major. He could have broken his leg if he'd panicked, but instead he just stood there like a very good boy. He really is the best horse ever.

the warmer weather is bringing out his allergies as well, boo

Still, the physio recommended at least 10 days completely off, maybe more depending on how he does. He can be glad that he's a very relaxed dude who spends most of his field time eating and sleeping or he might have ended up being confined in a smaller space. For now, though, he still goes out all day his friends, and gets his leg iced twice a day. The swelling has gone down quite a lot, but it's still a little puffy and hot... and we're on day 9 now. So I'm not sure yet how it's going to turn out.

I'm just so, so grateful that he doesn't seem to be experiencing any major pain, and that it doesn't seem to be a major injury even if it ends up taking a few weeks to recover. I will happily take a few weeks' recovery time over the possibility of months, years, or even completely losing him... it doesn't even bear thinking about.

When I mentioned that we had been thinking of SA Champs in mid-September, the physio seemed to think we miiight still be able to go... but I decided to just scratch the whole idea. As much as I want to be more competitive, and more bold in my competitive choices, I'm not going to bring my competitive plans into play when it comes to his soundness. I'm pretty sure he'll be rideable again by mid-September, but would he really be fit enough? Would it really be fair? Would I be tempted to push him just a little harder than I really think I should? I'm not even going to go there, thanks. So that's SA Champs off the table for us.

That did mean a little breathing room in the budget (briefly... see below) so I finally bought a pair of ice boots. I can't believe I went so long without them; I have them at the Friesians and they are one of the most wonderful inventions in the world.

Anyway, I'm definitely more careful about how we tie his haynet since, but mostly I'm just really grateful about how all this turned out. He could really have hurt himself, and I will happily ice his legs and rest him and deal with this comparatively minor boo-boo compared to what could have happened.

The real disaster struck on Tuesday. Magic seemed OK when I checked on him around 6am, but there was a bit of hay left in their haynets, which isn't really that normal. Skye was eating the tops off some old dry (known and not poisonous) weeds at the time (like... why, ole lady? you can barely chew hay) so I thought perhaps she'd just been nibbling weeds instead of eating hay, but it wasn't that much left over that it worried me. He was napping in his usual place, and there were nice normal fresh poos everywhere, so I went about my day. He ate his breakfast and his temperature was normal.

When the guys went to feed Skye her lunch, though, Magic was just standing around again and their morning haynets were almost untouched (the old girl really doesn't eat much hay because she chews so slowly). Definitely a warning bell. I checked him out and he had gut sounds all round but they were a little reduced in the right upper quadrant. His heart rate and mucus membranes were pretty normal, but he did have a fever of 39.5. I was pretty confused then because he had no colic signs at all, and I know this dude well - I know when he's colicking. Still, I wasn't happy. If it had been any other horse, I would have given him a bit of flunixin and waited it out for the afternoon, but it wasn't. It was Magic, so at 3pm, I called the vet. He passed a little bit of normal-looking poo and nibbled some grass while we waited.

he was grazing and then this look came into his eyes and I knew 💔

I really didn't think he had colic until 4pm, just before the vet arrived, when he started to look at his flanks a bit. His heart rate spiked to the 50s then, and when the vet arrived ten minutes later, he was shivering, his heart rate was in the 60s, and he was panting with pain. She took one look at him, uttered an F-bomb, and told me to load and go. This was absolutely the right decision and such an important part of why I have established relationships with numerous vets in the area - they know him and they know he means business when he's colicking. She gave him some flunixin to keep him comfortable and a bit of Buscopan, and we put him on the horsebox and took him straight to hospital.

My poor beloved man was busy recovering from an awful stomach flu of his own at that point, so my mom and dad dropped everything to help me take the old boy to the vet. Thank you 💜

He's been there ever since. He has an impaction, likely in the sternal flexure, and while it doesn't seem as bad this time as it did last time, it's been three days with no real difference. At this point, everything possible is being done for him (thank God, earnestly, for insurance), but it could go either way. If the impaction finally shifts, then he'll be OK. Sometimes it can take a while - he's been in hospital for 4-5 days before with the same thing - and sometimes they don't shift medically, and he's not a surgical candidate.

He obviously has the whole vet hospital wrapped right around his little finger. He may have been a bit of a nightmare to ride, but Magic has always been the best patient in the entire world. Even though he wasn't in any pain by the time we arrived at the hospital, he submitted so happily to getting his catheter, a rectal, a tube, having his tummy scanned, all without sedation - he just played right along. The vets love him to bits and one of them confided in me that she had given him a nice long ear scratch, which he truly loves.

I haven't been to see him, partly because it is so hard for me to get away during the week, but also because I know I will be a wreck. Emotionally, of course I want to go and see him; but I know that having a weepy, stressed human clinging to him is not what he needs right now. He is so sensitive to my emotions, and right now he is surrounded by dedicated professionals doing their best for him, and that's the vibe he needs. He doesn't need a stressed-out, heartbroken mama crying into his mane. He's done that enough for me. I can cry into Lancey's mane for a bit until he gets better, God willing. I'll just be here holding the others a little bit closer. It's a privilege to have them with us, a privilege that we so often take for granted until it's too late.

All that to say, he is in Abba's Hands, just where he belongs. We have done everything humanly possible for him; now it's up to God. And whatever He wills, whatever He chooses, I trust that. I trust Him.

God is good.

WW: Winter's End

 August is the last month of true winter here, and while I desperately love the Highveld in all of its moods, August is definitely my least favourite. May, June and July bring bitterly cold, frosty nights, with balmy, sunny, windless days ranging from about 10-18C. It's dry and quiet, and the days are short, but the weather is very nice for riding and the frost means that we don't have to deal with any bugs.

Then August comes along, and while the nights are far warmer, this does mean that occasionally some flies and ticks start making a reappearance. The days are hot but filled with a dry, warm, unpleasant wind; which, after three months without rain, stirs up endless clouds of fine, red dust. Of course, this coincides nicely with shedding season, and nothing can stay clean (especially my poor little house). It's a hard month to be a horse, too, having coped through the winter with no green grass and now dealing with the miserable wind and the colic weather.

I'm not a fan, but miserable as August is, it's a harbinger of the bright, abundant Highveld summer that I love so much. The wind and warmth brings the rain along with it, and I'm more than ready to see some beautiful rain on this sad, parched earth again. So, as we walk into the last month of the winter, we practice our willingness to wait, our gratitude for hardship, and our ability to hope.

I just had to share this breathtaking image by Ashleigh Kabe Photography. This is Kalvin fan Stal Bellafleur, AKA Jakobus, the stud stallion at the Friesian farm and the sire of most of their youngstock. He is an incredible animal who just went to his first Advanced with Coach J, and he's also just wonderful to handle - I can walk him right past the mares in a flat halter.

My little Friesian livery is working on her intense phobia of the horsebox. We have reached the point where we can get into the horsebox now, and we're working on closing the bar behind her. She's definitely had some kind of traumatic experience in a box in her past, but she tries so, so hard.

Lancey somehow managed to bruise his right hind fetlock playing rough in the field with a friend. He came nicely sound after two weeks, but the very day he was finally sound again, the same friend bit him right on his back where the saddle goes. He at least got some work done once I'd made an improv lungeing snake.

Titan, Isaiah, and old Toy Town enjoying one of the rare nice days we've had recently.

The young stallion at the Friesians. He's standing on a hill in this picture, but he is absolutely drop-dead freaking gorgeous - and almost just as quiet as Jakobus. He also rolls at every opportunity and his gorgeous self is permanently grubby, LOL.

Slowly building up my confidence with riding stallions. K has been my stunt double for riding him, which I am eternally grateful for. He is an extremely well-behaved boy but my lizard brain doesn't know that. At least I can ride him enough now to fine-tune his walk/trot work and lateral work, and K does the canter work.

Rene is 238 days today. Only about 100 days to go! She is not a maiden but I don't know her history, so we have no idea how many days she'll go. She somehow managed to scratch the surface of her cornea, but it is slowly healing with tons of medicating. I think we would have had to place a lavage in her eyelid on any other horse, but she is so good and kind that we can still put drops in multiple times a day without a problem despite the soreness. Such an incredible girl.

The big herd chilling on a lovely Saturday evening. Rene, Flash, Faith, Milady, Arwen, and Boo, with Spirit in the background. This winter has been quite rough, but they're still looking pretty good.

These two little boys have my heart 💜

This is Charlize Theron, the first chicken we raised from hatching.

Family photo!

My sister with one of our lavender Pekins, Lainey-Lou.

My man and his chooks 💜

A pregnant Arwen! Her weight has been under control all winter, which is definitely a result of the pregnancy. She has been off work for the first time since we got her nearly 13 years ago. I'll put her back in work when BabyDragon is on the ground, but I think a well-deserved rest is in order.

202 days today. She normally goes to about 345, so we're waiting on a Christmas baby.

Since she's not competing for the next year or so, I put her mane into plaits to grow it out like a real Nooitie mane. We'll see how that goes. (Also, Ladybug ate Milady's ENTIRE tail when she was a foal, so hopefully BabyDragon won't be able to do the same thing).

Anja 💜 my favourite four-year-old Friesian. She is by Jakobus and definitely has his beautiful head.

God is good!

Onward, Noble Steed

 Ever since Thunder came back into work a few weeks ago, I have one thing on my mind with him: forward. It's been a struggle ever since I backed him, but I have the tools these days to deal with it so much better.

I was actually amazed by how much I progressed as a rider in the six weeks that Thunder was out of work. When I got back on him again, there was so much that I could actually fix - stuff that had been bothering me for years but that I just couldn't quite get sorted out. And now we're finally getting to a place where I'm much happier with him, and we're starting to touch on this amazing horse's true potential.

I did take my whip back, though. I generally don't need to do very much with it, except maybe a few touches at the start of the ride to reinforce my ever-useless right leg, but riding him only with the spurs was beginning to devolve into an argument. He will need to carry his own butt a lot more forward before we try that again. At any rate, I can pretty much abandon the whip somewhere near the middle of each ride, which is just fine; even at a championship show I'll be allowed to warm up with it.

As a rule, though, he has been SUPER forward for his past few rides and so we can finally move on. We've still been doing most of the EM/M movements (single flying changes, half-pass, shoulder-in, even started playing with canter to halt), but focusing more on the gait quality with each ride than the movements. He really learns the movements quickly, they're never a problem, but the quality of the gaits is something I really need to pay more attention to.

Last week I got him a lot more straight and forward than normal and let him grow up into the contact more as well (obviously I've been overbending him without knowing it - welcome to the struggle bus, y'all) and honestly he felt AMAZING. He felt like he grew two hands and started taking much bigger, more swinging strides as well. It was a pretty wonderful feeling. I don't think I've ever felt him trot like that before.

I also put his mane into plaits because the beloved could no longer stand my awful mane-trimming jobs and begged me to let him grow his mane out instead, and I can't say no to that man

He's also so much more cheerful in his work now that I've made it clear that I'm not going to let him slop along behind my leg. Instead of arguing with my leg all the time, he understands what's expected of him and happily does as asked. In fact, he's positively enthusiastic about many things these days in a way that super-chill Thunder has never really been before. He LOVES his flying changes, especially when we play with the four-tempis, and even gave me a row of two-tempis recently. OK, so I was asking him to just canter down the centreline, but I couldn't exactly be upset about it regardless.

A big piece of the puzzle, I think, is physical fitness. I burned him out in late 2019 by schooling him every single day; he was fit, but it frazzled him mentally, more than I realized. Then I overcompensated by schooling him only three days a week, and sometimes missing a day here and there, and that was no good either. He just isn't fit enough to do what he knows how to do. Hacking is an absolute disaster on this animal (and not remotely relaxing for either of us), so at this point I've incorporated jumping back into his schedule once a week. He's a heavy dude and I have no interest in pounding his precious joints over big fences, but he does like doing his little gymnastics, and honestly it doesn't do me any harm to sharpen up whatever jumping skills I do have.

Another thing I need to work on is strengthening his left hind. He had a locking stifle on that side when he was younger; it hasn't locked for about two years at this point, but it's always his weaker side. He tends to twist his neck and lose impulsion in the shoulder-in left as a result, and struggles with really stepping over with his left leg, which makes his half-pass right a bit stiffer and less active than it is to the left. I think that some gymnastics will only serve to strengthen his hind end as a whole, as well as all the usual things I've been doing for his stifle for years - lateral work and rein-backs.

His top line is starting to reappear (and his beer belly is shrinking, lol)

Now that things have opened up a bit, I'm also starting to think of his show calendar for the rest of the year. Gauteng Dressage Champs ended up being postponed to the end of November, but SA Champs is in September, and I will likely ride at least one of the Friesians there so I would like to take him as well. It all depends on how he feels. We have a lesson next week, so that will probably be the deciding factor.

In other news, working chronologically through the Bible continues to be fascinating and rewarding. I feel like I'm looking at these familiar words and stories from a whole new perspective now that it's all in historical context. I'm into the later chapters of 2 Chronicles and 2 Kings, and studying the prophet Isaiah at this point. Isaiah is an absolutely remarkable book, and it's astonishing how much Jesus actually refers to this book in the Gospels. One chapter that particularly struck me was Isaiah 5, in which God describes the unfaithful nation Israel as being His vineyard: He has tended it and protected it, yet it has yielded no good fruit (faithful people doing His will). Then, in the Gospel of John, Jesus calls Himself the true vine, and tells us that we are all branches abiding in Him. It absolutely gave me goosebumps to stumble upon that comparison in the Old Testament, showing us how the coming of Christ utterly transformed our relationship with God. In the words of C. S. Lewis, "The Son of God became a man so that men could become the sons of God."

He is just magnificent. God is good.

Lancelot's First Elementary

Two weekends ago, Lancey had his dressage debut with me.

It was quite the experience for the little guy, and I was pretty nervous going into it. Firstly - I'd entered him in Elementary 5 and 6, for better or worse, and I knew that it was a big ask. What's more, we were going to a venue where neither of us had ever shown before, and we were traveling with Vlinder so Lancey would have to ride in a box he didn't know with a horse he didn't know. He also spent the night before the show at the Friesian farm, and he's never had to overnight anywhere except his breeder's.

Still, he's a good lil dude. He traveled and overnighted absolutely great, enjoying his sleepover with all his big, black buddies. It was very strange to arrive at the Friesian farm on the morning of the show and see a little white head looking over the door at me. He'd even had a nice sleep in the straw, so that clears up any worries I'd had about how he'd be at overnight shows.

(Thunder and Arwen are both horrible at overnight shows, so thank you, Mr. Lancey).

He was a little sticky to load, but not too worried, and traveled like a little pro as always. When we arrived I hopped straight onto Vlinder and left her groom with Lancey, who ate his hay and ignored the rest of the world completely.

I was totally exhausted when I got off Vlinder - she was good, but gave it everything I had - and it was so pleasant to get to work plaiting my own horse and not get pulled all over the showgrounds. Don't get me wrong - I adore Arwen and we had a really, really wonderful time competing together - but it's so nice to have a sweet quiet little gelding who just nibbled on his hay while I sorted out his hair with his lead hanging over my arm.

We walked over to the warmup to find it fairly busy and full of relatively stressed people frantically practicing their simple changes. (I very quickly became one of them; Elementary is dang stressful, y'all).

I had changed my approach to the mental side of this competition. I knew going in that Vlinder was going to get her grading points pretty much regardless of what I was doing up there, and I wasn't worried about getting a certain score on Lancey - we were going for the experience. So it seemed like a good opportunity to tweak my approach a bit, even if it was taking a little risk. I have heard such great things about visualisation and for the last few shows on Thunder I was using it a LOT, especially the night before the show if I couldn't sleep and on the way to the show. For some reason, if I woke up in the night and rode my tests perfectly in my head, it would always go well, chill me out, and I'd go straight back to sleep. But if I tried to visualise on the way to the show, I always, without fail, forgot my tests and panicked. It ended up making me even more panicked once I was riding the actual tests.

I think I was overthinking my attempt not to overthink, which would just be typical.

my face though

So this time, when I woke up in the middle of the night before the show, I ran through all my tests in my head like I always do. But the morning of the show, I skipped it. I ride my tests at home foot perfectly without visualizing or doing anything different - I just ride them, and a dang sight better than I ride at shows, too. So that was my tactic: stop overthinking and just ride like I always ride.

The other new piece of kit I have in my anti-show-nerves toolbox is box breathing (inhale for a count of four, hold for four, exhale for four, wait for four, repeat). I synced my breathing with Lancey's strides as we walked around the warmup, and it didn't take long for that tingly nervous feeling to leave my hands, and my brain actually began to work. Amazing how oxygen will do that.

Lancey himself was super in the warmup. He couldn't care less about the other horses zooming around; he was a little looky at his surroundings, but went on with his job very nicely even though he'd never been to this venue before. To be fair, he's always a bit looky. It doesn't mean a thing.

We ran through our test movements and he was just fine. After a few minutes, I checked the time. It was nearly my ride time, but we were number 18 and number 17 was still in the warmup. I assumed that number 17 would be riding before me, but actually, they had only entered test 6 - I'd entered both. Something I definitely could have like... looked up on the ride times, but apparently my organization skills - which keep 10 kids together through 20+ classes on a SANESA day - had completely failed me. So I sat around happily waiting for number 17 to go, and when my ride time came and went, decided to head over to the arena anyway.

We were standing on the outside of the arena and I was shrugging on my jacket when suddenly the bell went. I looked up, and there was no one near the show arena except me. Normally I think riders have to be allowed to go around the outside of the arena at least once before the bell goes, but I was late anyway, so I decided to just roll with it and off we went down the centreline.

why yes that is a dirty patch on his bum

He did a nice little halt and then saw the judge's box at C and hesitated. I could have spurred him through it, but knowing Lancey, that would have resulted in tension through the rest of the test, so I let him stop and petted his neck and talked to him until I felt him take a deep breath. Then we carried on, and he didn't look at it once. I think if we'd gone around the outside before the test, he wouldn't have cared about it at all.

Of course, because I was busy sorting out his spook when K read the next part of the test, I then got promptly lost. The judge must have thought I was certifiably insane. No big deal, though; we went back around and started again, with an exasperated K yelling everything extra loudly (sorry K).

Overall, I felt like the first test went pretty well. I asked him for too much angle in one of the shoulder-ins, and he got a little stuck behind in the turns on the haunches, but that's something we have yet to iron out at home so I wasn't too bothered about that. His canter work was extremely obedient - I think he took a trot step or two going down into one of the simple changes, but they felt pretty good, and the counter-canter felt balanced and together.

I was really happy with him when we came out of the test. Despite the mistakes in the beginning, he had been identical to the way he always is at home, and best of all, I had ridden the way I ride at home. I didn't once get that wobbly, disembodied feeling that always means I've stopped breathing in the middle of the test. In fact, I felt normal and natural in the saddle and I breathed like a human being throughout. I don't think I've ever felt so good coming out of a dressage test. He really is the best boy 💜

The second test was in the next arena, which had a little shed/judge's box thingy near P which was full of jump uprights and things. It didn't seem particularly spooky just looking at it, but a lot of horses had been very nervous about it - Vlinder even had a little look at it and she's not even remotely spooky. Lancey is the BEST boy but Arabs gonna Arab so I had some concerns.

He looked at the judge's box at C, but again, I just stroked his neck and talked to him and he went right on past. The judge rang the bell before I could get to P but I decided to use my 45 seconds for good and spent some time letting him look at the spooky box. Still, he didn't take a deep breath, but my time was running out so I just walked him past and headed down the centreline.

He didn't look at the judge's box even once, and we started our test very happily and obediently. He was behaving pretty much exactly as he does at home - until we reached the last part of the test. It involves a half-circle E-B in counter canter, a simple change over P, a canter-to-walk at K, and then the walk tour: turn right at V, turn on the haunches right between L and P, turn on the haunches left between L and V, trot at L, centerline at A, halt at X.

It's a lot of movements packed into one small part of the arena, which would be no problem except that that happened to be the spooky part of the arena. Lancey was OK going past the spooky box, but when we did the counter-canter half circle, a bunch of ducks came running across the field right behind the box. His canter gave a big stutter, and he trotted sideways down into the simple change. We picked up the canter again but he was quite discombobulated and I didn't get him put together quickly enough for the walk transition. Of course, when we turned across the arena towards P, we were heading directly towards the box. He kept it together, but the turns on the haunches were a joggy, wobbly mess (and they're honestly kind of a mess in general).

When we finished that test, I had already mentally discarded the score. He hadn't been naughty or difficult, but tense enough to mess up all those movements in the end, and I chalked it up to experience. The little guy just needs to get out and about and see more things for that to go away; he stayed rideable, he stayed listening, it was just a bit of greenness.

I was unsurprised by my score of 51% for the second test; that whole last section was a slew of 3s and 4s for breaking and hurrying and doing all those fun things. But I was honestly pretty shocked when my score came in for test 5. It was 55%. I wasn't expecting miracles - I was hoping for a 60% - but it was a lot lower than I'd been expecting. We did have those two mistakes in the beginning, but overall we did just get a whole lot of 5s.

I was honestly a bit disappointed by that score, but I think it all comes down to the fact that he doesn't always let my aids go through him, and when I'm being a little conservative then I'm not consistent enough about really asking for those aids to go through. He doesn't quite carry himself right yet, but because he's such an obedient and willing little horse - and has three lovely gaits - he can do the movements of the level cleanly, just not well enough to get a better mark. Comparing the photos from the show to the photos from our last lesson, I think I let the gait quality slip in favour of the movements over the last week or two.

Still, scores or no, I was really, really happy with my first dressage show on Lancey just because of how relaxed I was feeling even though he was spooky. I don't know if I've ever trusted a horse like I trust him, barring old Skye when I was just a kid. It was genuinely fun and relaxing even though we weren't doing it perfectly. He gave me a feeling I've never had in the dressage arena before - a really, really good feeling.

I'll chat with my coach about what we do with him competitively going forward. I think I might show him at Novice for a few shows, mostly because shows are expensive and it'll be easier to get our grading points at Novice, which is mostly an obedience test (Lancey's got that covered). I can always skip Elementary entirely and ride him at EM once he goes up a grade, which is honestly a very attractive option (down with the simple changes!).

Either way, I was really happy with how this show went, and with this wonderful little horse. I'm going to have a lot of fun showing Lancey in the years to come, God willing - and I'm grateful for every minute I get to spend on his back.

God is good!

MS Lady Erin

 All the way back in 2016, I made my second foray into breeding horses. I had just bought the sweetest thoroughbred I've ever sat on - Magic Lady (now belonging to K), expressly for the purpose of breeding something both kind and athletic. Milady came off the track quiet enough to hack around in a halter, and I was smitten.

Milady in her racing days

Milady's first beau turned out to be the first and last warmblood I ever owned - an exquisite jumping-bred colt by the name of Exavior. Exavior ended up with me through an unexpected little twist of either fate or Providence; he would ordinarily have been worth more money than I could really even conceive at that point. His sire Esaro W and damsire Rivale d'Or had both been and produced A-grade jumping horses (if I remember correctly), and his dam, Cointreau d'Or, had herself jumped up to about 1.20m before retiring to stud.

Exavior was exorbitantly too much for me from the start, however, even after I gelded him once Milady was pregnant. I eventually realized this and sold him - one of the smarter decisions of my teenage years, honestly - and he went on to jump up to the 1.20m before he sadly passed away while he was still quite young. He was being produced by an Open rider at the time and I'm pretty sure he would have jumped the big grades if he'd lived long enough.

The result of this match was born at a quarter past four in the afternoon on October 21st, 2016, with a gaggle of adoring riding school teens staring in awe. 

The foal was a tall and precocious little filly who was on her feet before she was an hour old. I named her Lady Erin after my best-best-best-best-best friend, who was suitably flattered. We had to give her a little help suckling, but overall, it was absolutely textbook... until it wasn't. 

Ladybug, as she eventually became known, was only five days old when I noticed that Milady had swollen lymph nodes and a slight temperature. The vet was out pronto and pronounced that she had strangles... and that she would likely be the first of many. I was nineteen years old, had not yet passed my stable manager's exam, and had only a measly few months of experience when I was plunged into the unbelievable disaster that is managing an outbreak of a massively contagious disease in a herd of horses living out. The one consolation was that strangles is not typically fatal... except in the very old, the immunocompromised, and the very young. At five days, Ladybug certainly fell into that category.

Three very intense weeks followed. Milady took a long time to recover fully from the strangles and lost an unbelievable amount of weight. Ladybug, however, soldiered on with the type of cheerful sassiness that can only come from a few-day-old baby chestnut mare. She didn't have a single day of sickness and by the time it was all over, she was so used to being hugged and cuddled and kissed and carefully inspected that she was ready for the flood of riding school kiddos to fawn over her. She became the darling of the whole yard and had all the attention she could ever want.

When Ladybug reached weanling age, the yard hit a major financial pothole. I had started out with rather more ambition than sense, and between schoolies, resale projects, and my ever-growing herd of own horse, things were getting ridiculous. I had to put her on the market, and she was quickly snapped up by a lovely, experienced home hours away on the southern coast.

I thought that that was the last time I'd ever see Ladybug. Erin and I were both doing some serious social media stalking, but there's not a whole lot that most people post about 1, 2, or 3-year-old babies growing up in the field.

Then, in January, Erin stumbled on a sales ad. A horse matching Ladybug's description was being sold for a song. We got in touch with the owner, who was heartbroken to let Ladybug go, but didn't have a choice; circumstances had grown hard, as they did for so many people at that time. I started putting out feelers, hoping desperately that someone would buy her and offering a year's free livery and schooling to anyone that would. I couldn't bear for that lovely sweet filly to have anything other than a soft landing.

Of course, my stableyard is filled with the most wonderful people. Within a day, two people had stepped forward offering to buy Ladybug even though neither of them were really shopping for horses at the time. In the end, it was Erin herself, Ladybug's namesake, who bought her. We had her shipped up to my place and the moment she stepped off the truck it was as though she knew. She looked around, sighed deeply, and seemed contented to be home.

I'm so delighted that Ladybug is here with me again. She ended up a little small - about 15.1 or 15.2 - but that's not an issue for Erin. In hindsight, I don't think I'll sell a weanling again. They're just too fragile at that age to have their lives shaken up like that.

Starting to look like something!

Anyway, so Ladybug and I have been getting along famously. I've grown very used to my super sweet Friesians - they are definitely very different from the other breeds I've worked with - so I was a little worried about working with this young warmblood. But honestly, despite the fact that her training schedule is more patchy than the Friesians' thanks to my hectic life, Ladybug has been one of the easiest youngsters I've ever had the pleasure of working with. She definitely has a sassy streak in her, but she's hugely willing and kind and surprisingly unreactive for her breed. True to being a warmblood, too, she doesn't muscle up as easily as the Friesians, but she does hold her cardio fitness a lot better.

Also, her canter is absolutely incredible. Little short in the neck in this moment, but soooo balanced and engaged for her age and fitness

Accordingly, when Erin came over Sunday two weeks ago (dang I'm so behind), she could have a little sit on the Ladybug.

First I did a spot of groundwork, doing a five-minute lunge like I always do just to check in with her brain and body and give her a little bit of exercise - her actual ridden work won't be real exercise for a couple of months yet. (Am I the slowest young horse starter in existence? Yes. Do my horses learn in a low-stress way, both in mind and body? Also yes. I'll go with slow).

Like she always does, Ladybug came out focused, relaxed, and ready for work. After a brief lunge, we went on to a little bit of turn on the forehand from the ground. I usually like my babies to have shoulder-in on the ground as well before jumping on, but Ladybug's in-hand work has come on just a touch slower than my Friesians because she's less food-driven than they are. In other words, she won't turn herself inside out for a bit of carrot, LOL. We're still getting there.

After rewarding each effort, I always give the horse a couple of moments at liberty for chewing time and thinking time, and also to check in with her mental state. Liberty - whether it's full-on join-up or just dropping the contact for a few strides - is always a great check-in. Ladybug is very happy to be connected to me, and stayed locked onto me even after moments of tension while she was figuring out her work.

Once we'd worked on those a little, it was time to head over to the mounting block. Normally I prefer to do the first few rides in the ring, but she's so chill that I didn't mind riding in the big arena. I'd sat on her a time or two before this and she was as relaxed as could be.

I started with some of my usual mounting block work. She really doesn't mind standing still while I'm on the block beside her, so I flapped the stirrups,

 

then flapped the saddle flap,

then leaned over and patted her loudly all over. As you can see, she tipped back an ear to listen to what I was doing over there, but wasn't worried about a thing.

Finally, I gave her a little treat on the off side - preparation to reward her for standing at the mounting block.

I do my preparation work carefully so that I can gently drag my toe all the way over her butt when I go to sit for the first few times. That way, if she gets an accidental toe-poke later on, there's no freaking out to be done.

Her expression here is just perfect. She's listening and paying attention to what's happening on her back, but she's not afraid at all.

Of course, she didn't worry one bit about me being up there. She flicked back her ears while I got on, just to listen to what was going on and to focus while she kept her balance, and then she got a treat and was perfectly happy.

Every time I sit on a young horse those first few times, it's a moment that feels so precious it's almost sacred. There is so much at stake in those moments. You could ruin so much if you did it wrong, and gain so much if you do it right. More than that, it's a glorious thrill of venturing into a place where no one in the world has ever been before; that secret plane inhabited by horse and rider, spine to spine. That feeling is a thousand times more special when the horse is one that you bred. And while her previous owner did sit on her a little, so I wasn't the first one up there, it was still a really wonderful moment. I watched this little mare take her very first steps, and now here we are.

She got a little bored of me just sitting there and petting her, so she turned around and went to chew the mounting block. I don't get after babies for moving in a relaxed manner the first few times I'm on board, so I just went with her and kept on petting her. After a few moments I hopped off - it was Erin's turn.

Ladybug didn't even tip her ears back this time as Erin got on. I kept a finger on her nose to hold her still while I stepped back to take a picture.

Erin was extremely chuffed.

We took the opportunity for me to walk a circle or two - not holding her, but joined-up - and she happily followed me around the arena with Erin on her back, not worried in the slightest. They look so great together even now - I can't wait to see a schooled Ladybug being ridden by her doting mom.

This little horse and this lovely person are both intensely special to me.

And I'm so grateful for the wonderful plan of God, Who brought our precious Ladybug back into our lives at just the right moment.

He is so good!