Goals?

 For the past couple of years, I didn't really set riding goals. First there was the uncertainty of the pandemic and then there was so much burnout that just trying to ride occasionally was about as much as I could possibly manage.

I've often debated about setting goals and this year was no different. 2020 taught us that we have absolutely no idea what's going to happen, and my super-driven, slightly-obsessive, type-A brain loves to freak out if goals go unmet. But even though that brain burns me out sometimes, it's also pretty good at getting things done, and there are things I would love to do. So this year, I'm going to set goals - I'm just not going to live and die for them. They can just be guidelines, not must-haves. Something to shape fun time with horses, not the purpose of time with horses.

Obviously now I need to go on a whole tangent about how horses fit in my life now, so sorry about that, but here it comes.

After leaving the Friesians, I did some soul-searching on what horses really mean to me. Ever since I was a teenager, I'd been pursuing professional dressage, and I'd always told myself that I could do it and I would love it if only I had the right circumstances. The Friesians presented me with the perfect circumstances... and I didn't love it. I was living the dream and the dream wasn't what I wanted. It was hard to let go of that, and afterwards I wasn't sure that I even wanted to compete anymore. I knew I wanted to ride, but for the first time I gave myself the option to give up competition, and I was surprised by how unappealing that option was. The truth is, I'm still in love with horses. I'm still in love with dressage and I still love schooling, competing, managing and maintaining dressage horses.

The difference is, I have the freedom, by the grace of God, to do it my way, without pressure, with my sweet horses. After taking a solid break from serious riding while we were planning the wedding, I miss it. This is a beautiful gift I've been given and I intend to enjoy it to the very full.

What's more, I very carefully considered and prayed over the stableyard itself, since we honestly had a fairly miserable SANESA year (with a few exceptions) and it stressed me out disproportionately. The Lord finally led my heart back to the reason why the yard exists. The yard is my ministry. It's a way to make a difference in the world. Getting sucked into the worldly pressures doesn't serve its purpose well. So, while we'll continue with SANESA and I continue to offer my best to the kiddos and hope for good seasons for them, I'm overjoyed to have the freedom to pursue my deepest dream for the yard: to make it a place of hope and healing. Not pressure and stress. I applied to study equine-assisted psychotherapy and 2023 will be the first of two years' study. To be clear, EAP involves a team of treatment professionals: a qualified psychologist with specialization in EAP, a qualified equine behaviourist with specialization in EAP, and a qualified horse with specialization in being a horse. God willing, I'll be the behaviourist part of the team when my studies are finished, and then we can finally utilize this beautiful space and our treasured horses to help humans heal.

So that's the first goal of 2023, then: to finish the equine behavioural course for this year. Next year, God willing, will be the EAP part.

On to the dressage part. I'm lucky enough to have three horsies to ride this year - and maybe even the time to actually ride them. What a breathtaking privilege!

Thunder is obviously the one at the highest level, so I plan to keep my main focus on him. We've got a few small, local shows penciled into the calendar to gain points in EM 4, 5, and 6 or Medium 1, 2, and 3 (if I ride EM 1 and 2 one more time on this horse I will scream) in the first half of the year, which is a bit chaotic because of SANESA. Then, in winter, when the horse sickness has died down and his skin is at its best, I hope to tackle one or two big shows, maybe at Medium depending how he feels by then and on his points. The ones I have in the calendar for now are Gauteng Champs, FEI Dressage Challenge (at the non-FEI level, obviously lol) and Dressage Connection if I feel like I have the confidence to face an international judge giving feedback afterwards. I have zero delusions of winning anything against the pros and imports at his level, but I couldn't care less. It would just be for the experience.

Finally, I've got another small show for October, where it would be cool to ride Advanced 1. I think he's already done some pretty spectacular things in his life, but this would be fun and challenging to work towards together and I would get to wear a tailcoat which I would very much like to do please. The test itself is all movements we've schooled quite a bit at home but obviously stringing it all together is a different kettle of fish, plus we'd need to have the points to do it.

Another major Thunder goal, and probably the most important one, is to get him a new saddle. The old Blackburn was a gift and it has done incredibly well for two years, but I'm wearing actual holes in it now, so it's time to retire it.

Lancey is at his very best out on the trails, but he's also turning into a super cool little dressage/showing horse. He has a super work ethic and finally seems to be enjoying his arena work as well. I'm not really into the Arab shows, but if they have another one at Afridome this December, I'll turn myself inside out in order to go - it was the most fun show I've ever been to when we went in 2021. This year we were on honeymoon during the show (which was more fun than any show, without going into too much detail) so I hope to make it in 2023. It would be fun to enter some dressage shows too, maybe try to get his points up a bit, do some higher Novice and lower Elementary tests.

Most importantly, I'd love to take him out to another DRASA (competitive trail for those across the pond) ride. We've done the fun ride at Klipkraal two years running but didn't actually do a competitive ride in 2022, and we both love them. I have visions of exploring neighboring farms on him with friends this year. He's fit enough and reliable enough and it would be so much fun.

Arwen came back into work gently over the last few months of 2022 and she's not quite competition fit yet, but fit enough to do some lessons and start more intense work. At 16, having had two years off, she's come back as sound as a brass bell and flaming hot (for me, anyway. For the riding school kiddos she's as gentle as a lamb). Her big show for 2023 is right on the horizon - Horse of the Year, always our jam. I won't show her in hand again since she's won Nationals several times now and I don't think she has anything left to prove, but we'll just boogie in the ridden classes and have a good time.

We're also trying out something new - Working Equitation. It's practically free to attend and looks like fun and a good break from dressage. We'll do a clinic and maybe one show and see how it suits us. I think Arwen will love it because it basically looks like working riding but faster. If nothing else, it'll be good practice for HOY.

We might do a dressage or two later in the year, when she's fitter and can cope with an Elementary or EM test. Technically she has points for EM, so it would be cool to slowly work towards getting her to Medium, maybe in 2024. Honestly this mare has absolutely nothing to prove to me and I just want to enjoy her.

Finally, there's Wynnie, who will also go to HOY just for the experience. She's still a total baby and our main thing for this year is to get her to stand still for a bath. All the other life skills are pretty much in place, except for clipping, which can come later.

Excited and overjoyed to have so much to look forward to.

God is good.